Funny Children Stories

Hallie Fitzsimmons

Working in a child center and being involved in Teacher Ed I am surrounded by funny children. This being said, I have a plethora of stories, good and bad. It’s time for me to share some of them. I promise to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me god.

I was walking around the classroom helping the kids with their morning work. They were working on the ever tricky ‘M’. They had to draw a picture with something that starts with ‘M’. Some ideas were thrown out and a bunch of kids decided to draw thier moms. One little girl drew her mom and wrote “mom” at the bottom. Her table partner saw this and leaned over the table. Then she said “Hey! My mom spells her name the same way!” The other girl responded “Really? M-O-M?” “Yeah!” I couldn’t help but chuckle at this. But I said nothing, because that is just too cute!

I playing basketball with a boy in the gym. He was telling me about how many sports he plays. He then told me that when they missed a football practice they had to run 50 laps and do 50 pushups, or something like that. I told him how hard I thought that was and then he told me “Yeah things get pretty hard when you get into 4th grade.” I chuckled because he did know what was coming for him. Just wait till junior year little Johnny.

I was watching a lightning storm with a little child. I was trying to show him lightning and after a failed attempt he randomly started to talk to me about how fast and strong he was. After a while of acting amused he started saying “God is the biggest and the strongest of all!… I hope God has a big booty!” I immediately asked “You hope he has a big booty?” and he just promptly said yes. No explanation. Well, I can’t argue there.

I was watching some of the children color. Some other kids were getting too rowdy so I went over to calm them down. Then one of the girls who was coloring came up to me and handed me a white crayon and said “This one doesn’t work.” I laughed and told her that it wasn’t supposed to on white paper. She never took her eyes off me and calmly said, once again, “This one doesn’t work.” I tried explaining it again and she just gave me the same reply. Then I just thanked her for telling me that it was “broken” and she went back to coloring. A little bit later she came up to me with a hand full of white crayons and said “These are all the ones that don’t work.” So I just set them all to the side and laughed to myself.